C. E. D.
- Cat Eradication Device......otherwise known to the layman as a Water Ballon.
Acupuncture - The appliction of kitties teeth to human flesh....also known as being bit.
Rear End Slicer Activation - When kitty grabs ahold of your arm or leg with it's front paws
and then begins to scratch you with it's rear paws.
Unhappiness - Level of how MAD you are at the kitty at any particular time.
Failure - In the case of working with kitties Failure means your mistake of thinking kitty actually wanted that particular thing in the first place. Kitty has made a fool of you which is his primary goal.
Offensive Language - All of THOSE words that MOM used to smack you for using. And still will!
Drop Dead Look - Look especially used by kitties to convey to you that IT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN! It's closest cousin is the look the COP gives you when you lie to him to get out of a ticket.
VARIATIONS - All illegal (non-sanctioned) kitty tools....such as Tail Toss, Scruff of Neck Catapult or High Altitude Flying Lessons.
Kitty Brakes - Kitty's ability to stop. This ability is greatly influenced by the current material the kitty is standing on at the time. Furniture, carpet and grass provide great Kitty Brakeability and also promotes great Kitty Traction(see below). However, tables and hard floors without carpet provide the opposite known as Kitty Slip(see below).
Kitty Traction - Kitty's ability to accellerate and make turns swiftly without slipping and wiping out.
Kitty Slip - Kitty's inability to gain Kitty Traction(see above) in order to swiftly move about without achieving Kitty Wipeout.
Kitty Finger - You may have received something similar when you cut off other drivers and they give you that hand signal. However, you must learn to spot this one from kitty. First kitty applies the Drop Dead Look(see above) and then looks away from you as if you were a bug to be stepped on later.